Let’s start with a question: how many times have you written an email, then read it over too many times, edited it, rewritten it, and then still been nervous about sending it? Maybe you still have a few of these in your drafts…
It’s more than once or twice, isn’t it?
Don’t worry – email anxiety isn’t just a ‘you’ problem; everyone suffers from it a little. Even I have been known to hover nervously over the send button before thinking ‘nah’ and going through it again, and I literally write emails all day, every day, for a living.
So, what can we do about email fear? The answer – send it anyway… but let me explain.
What is the Root of Email Fear?
We worry that we’re going to offend someone or that we’ll be judged. What if we made a mistake? What if an unseen spelling error makes us look much dumber than we want to show? What if they don’t like it?
Email fear can be boiled down to a few categories:
- Lack of confidence - You’re unsure about your writing skills or think your message may be unclear and be misinterpreted.
- Fear of negative feedback or rejection - What if they’re too critical? What if the proposal you’ve written is too much? What if they hate it?
- A need for perfectionism - Your emails have to be flawless before you send them out, with every i dotted and every t crossed (and yes, I know that it’s impossible to have a typed email i without a dot, or a t without it being crossed, but the saying stands!).
Let’s face it – it’s going to be one of those three things; but what do we do to fix it?
Embrace Good Enough
Here’s the thing, ‘good enough’ is better than ‘perfect’. It really is. An email that’s 80% right and got sent is far more likely to do its thing and return value than one that’s almost perfect, sitting at 99% and still in your drafts folder – because that one is doing nothing!
Focus on progress. If you get your message out there, it’s making some progress, even if it’s not perfect. You can work on the way you phrase things or develop your emails for next time, and maybe it’ll be a little better then. You will hone your message as you learn what works.
And get the timing right, because often timing is much more important than the perfectionism of the content. Getting your email to your customer at the right time means they get the message when they need it and not when it’s too late. No one wants to be informed of a sale the day it ends, reminded about their plane tickets when the aircraft is on the runway, or invited to a webinar that is starting right now!
Your email is good enough – send it.
Common Email Fears and How to Overcome Them
Embracing the ’80% there is good enough’ rule helps those who aren’t sending emails due to a need to be a perfectionist, but what about those other worries?
Beating the fear of upsetting people
First of all, unless you really know you’re upsetting someone with what you’re saying or you’re doing it on purpose, chances are you won’t upset them. Relax! But you can cover most bases by:
- Using a professional, friendly tone
- Avoiding over-casual language (by which I mean ‘don’t swear’ unless that’s part of your style!).
- Not talking about ‘hot topics’ unless that’s the very point of your email. Unless you’re in the news business, avoid politics and religion. If it works for dinner parties, it works for emails!
- Being considerate. Generally, if you’re taking the time to think about what you’re saying and how it might be taken, you’re already on the right path, and you won’t offend.
Conquering the concern about being misunderstood
Does your email make sense to you? Read it back and check, and if it does, then it’ll probably make sense to them, too!
- Use clear and concise writing, use simple language, and avoid jargon.
- Read your email out loud - you’ll be surprised how much more awareness you will have of the content when you take the time.
- Let someone you trust check it over for you. There’s never a problem asking for help!
- Make sure it’s not too long. Most of the time, emails become confused because they’re verbose and get lost in their own waffle. If it’s becoming an essay (or worse, a short novel), then consider cutting back!
Overcoming fear of mistakes
First of all, everyone makes mistakes. For most emails, the odd mistake is forgotten as quickly as it is read, so don’t beat yourself up too much about them. However, they can also be easily fixed:
Use software to proofread for you.
There are so many good tools out there that will read your email and fix technical issues that you’re spoilt for choice; there’s your email client (probably), tools like Grammarly, AI writing assistants like ChatGPT, and even the good ol’ cut-and-paste into Word technique. If you see a squiggly red line, right-click on it and do what it suggests!
Consider a follow-up email.
Let’s face it, you re-read your email after you sent it, didn’t you? Just to reassure yourself while you wait for the reply…! And that’s when you saw it: the glaring error that makes you want to curl into a ball. You know what? Admit to it. If it’s important that you cover it, send an amusing apology that not only fixes your error but actually can improve your personal brand and relationship.
That’s right, I’m talking about fixing an error as a marketing technique! When you follow up with a humble or amusing ‘Sorry, look what I just did! So embarrassing!’ email, you present your human side and cement your relationship just that little bit more.
(But don’t make mistakes on purpose just to do this, it won’t come across as authentic.)
Beating that fear of rejection
Not everything you write is going to go down perfectly. Instead, focus on providing value each time and building your relationships slowly and steadily.
While seeing people unsubscribe feels like a loss, look at it as just more market research, helping you refine your message and improve engagement with those who really are your customer base.
It’s easy to say ‘shake off the rejection and move on’ – certainly, it’s a lot easier for me to type than follow! But it’s true. Every rejection is merely a chance to learn and move on with more experience, and even the greatest in their fields get rejected and criticised – I know I do, and I’m great, right? Please tell me I’m great!!
Seriously though, it’s hard to take, especially the more importance you place on the email. Take a breath and send it out; once it’s gone, you’ll feel better.
Practical Tips for Conquering Email Fear
Here are a few final practical tips if everything I’ve said so far still isn’t quite giving you the confidence you need to hit the send button.
- Write a plan or outline the email before you write it - It’s amazing how much this helps structure and confidence.
- Always proofread - Remember the read out loud tip, and send it to someone you trust to check before it goes to the wider world.
- Segment and test - If you’re worried about it going out to so many people on your email list, pick a smaller group and see their reaction first. You can always tweak before it goes out to more people (but remember the advice about timing, it does need to get out there!).
- Remember it’s about the long game - Not every email is going to be successful, not everyone is going to engage with it, not everyone is going to connect, and a relatively small number are going to be pushed to act. That’s normal; relax.
- It doesn’t need to be perfect - Once you’ve got it 80% there, send it.
- And if you’re scared, send it anyway!
A Helping Hand with Nathan Littleton
If you need someone to proofread and check your email and offer some genuine and helpful advice, why not send it to me? I’m here to help you get your email marketing past the 80% line every time (note that I didn’t say ‘perfect’, we’re not looking for perfection!). If you’re looking for someone you can trust to help you conquer your email fear, look no further – contact me, Nathan Littleton, today.
